Summer Fun

Just some pics of our recent summer adventures




At the Jersey Shore on the beach and boardwalk,

Visiting Lola and Papa at the Amerisuites pool in Elkton, MD,



Pictures of the great bed at the Ritz-Carlton in Washington DC,


And Thomas DeCastro, I mean Darth Maul...

The Illegal Immigration Debate

Here's some excerpts from conversations regarding the subject of Illegal Immigration and views on the recent protests...Any thoughtful, non-incendiary comments are appreciated.

The New Colossus

Not like the brazen giant of Greek fame,

With conquering limbs astride from land to land;

Here at our sea-washed, sunset gates shall stand

A mighty woman with a torch, whose flame

Is the imprisoned lightning, and her name

Mother of Exiles. From her beacon-hand

Glows world-wide welcome; her mild eyes command

The air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame.

"Keep ancient lands, your storied pomp!" cries she

With silent lips. "Give me your tired, your poor,

Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,

The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.

Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,

I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"

I sent this poem out recently and got the following response:

A reminder…..

“We will not forget that Liberty has here made her home; nor shall her chosen alter be neglected.”

The alter is America and it is being neglected.

We are a country of laws. I feel that those who want change the laws should be citizens of our country. Protesters, legal or not, should show a little more respect to the millions of men and women who entered the country legally. Men, women and children waited in the shadow of the Statue of Liberty, they waited in fear that they would not be let into the country. Perhaps in this day and age this is too much to ask of others.

The real question is this “Do we allow the wishes of the few, to rule the majority? If that is the case then we no longer have liberty.”

The problem is difficult………and it will be laws that can make it right.

I recall another robed woman, one that stands with scales and a blindfold, her name is Justice.

There is right, there is wrong, and we determine what is law by our vote, it should be the voice of the majority not the few.

I then responded with this...

I agree that America is being neglected - at the expense of military imperialism and to the advantage of big business.

We are a country of laws – and those illegal immigrants who are employed are employed by Americans, and they do work for America – many have been working here for years – often for lawmakers and lawyers as nannies and housekeepers – I know there are lots in DC! They don’t want to break the laws – they want to change the laws. In yesterdays protests (albeit perhaps not in earlier protests) American flags were being waved proudly, and pro-American sentiment was rampant – those immigrants of yesteryear felt the same sentiments they came to this country (NOT always LEGALLY) hoping that the shining star that WAS America would allow them to make a new life for themselves and their children.

Now suddenly we have declared that the door is SHUT – no more will we welcome people who don’t meet some pre-established standard. Never mind that they do the work that most Americans are unwilling to do, never mind that they allow our economy to grow providing higher wage jobs for Americans while they break their backs building our houses, picking our crops in the hot summer sun, bussing our tables and washing our dishes, never mind that they are trying to escape a level of poverty that would BOGGLE the mind of the average American.
(See http://www.heritage.org/Research/Welfare/bg1713.cfm for more on this subject)

The problem is that the majority no longer rules in America – a small minority “rules” our country – big businessmen who break the rules and then get away with it, lobbies controlled by these businessmen control most of the political will – and then they (the big businesses and lobbies) pull off the ultimate diversion – they get the PR machine rolling and convince everyone that all their problems are caused by these immigrants. They are easily identifiable – they are a different color, they speak differently – (As one person put it “I HATE it when I go to a fast food restaurant and the person on the speaker has an accent”) – easy to point the finger at. Then they prey on our natural tendency to fear the “unknown” and they make us afraid of them – and we buy right into their fear tactics – just like they want us to.

So that we forget that NOT all of our problems are caused by these people, we forget that they are in fact, generally a productive part of our society. And that MANY of them are hard working family members just trying to get themselves out of poverty, living in their own country on less than $5/day. And we forget that many immigrants are LEGALLY here – but if they are out protesting in the streets we automatically assume they are illegal because they speak funny or look different. And we start fearing them, and we start hating them, and we start sending out messages to boycott their boycott – and “Quick feed the capitalism machine” that’ll fixem! And the big businessmen smile because they know their trick has worked…

And then – worst of all the “fear machine” makes us forget the basic tenets that our country was built upon. We forget that this country was built on the right to protest, we forget that this country was built on the rights of free speech and the right to assemble and petition the government – we forget that it is our duty to honor these rights as citizens of the US – we forget the very first Amendment in the Bill of Rights! The LAW of all LAWS in our Country – and we forget it.

Bill of Rights
Amendment I: Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances

These people are our neighbors, our co-workers, our friends – we are all immigrants. Imagine living in a wasteland – doing backbreaking labor everyday – heat and sweat and hunger constantly surrounding you – but right next door is this beautiful shining castle, with green lawns, and feasts and music and light. But there is a fence around it with a sign that says – “Sorry you can’t come in – you have to stay outside because you might ruin the party” – would you try to climb the fence? I know I would, over and over again…

Lady Justice is crying in America...

(Photo Credit to: Shivakumar Shankar at http://web.njit.edu/~ss228/Statue%20of%20Liberty.htm)

It's been a while and a LOT has happened...Stress, Stress, Stress...

It's been a while since I have blogged - months in fact - but I have been kind of busy...

We moved 2700 miles.

We unpacked a lot of boxes.

I went back to grad school (Fall 2005) got a 3.9 carrying 14 graduate credits.

Ron commutes across the State of Maryland TWICE daily.

I drive 80 miles/day to take him to back and forth to the train so he can commute across the State of Maryland.

Our kids are now 2 and 4 (see pic from Ethan's 2nd birthday).

They are both boys. There is lots of dirt. There is lots of throwing oneself on the floor. There is lots of sharing. There is lots of love and hugs and pats.

We flipped our car on Rte 40 on the way to work one icy morning. All are well but we all started thinking about our mortality.

Ron had a heart attack. He was unisured. He also has diabetes. I would be lost without him.

I am waiting to find out if I was admitted to the Knauss Marine Policy Fellowship Class of 2007, and worrying that I won't.


I don't have a dissertation topic. This is the really stressful part. I am thinking of and studying in depth fisheries and economics; international fisheries, gulf of mexico fisheries, developing states fisheries, collapsing fisheries, overcapacity, capital costs of entering fishing, ecosystem-based fishery managment, marine protected areas, property rights, modeling, environmental economics, commercial vs. recreational fisheries, marginal net benefit of a recreational fish versus marginal net benefit of a commercial fish, are commercial fisheries outdated, how will we retrain the current fishers if they are?

I don't know how to answer the question, or maybe I am not even sure what the question is... How do we arrest the catstrophic decline of the worlds fisheries? How do we maximize consumer welfare while we are arresting the catastrophic decline of the world's fisheries. In other words - the solution is simply less fishing pressure period - I guess the question is how can the reductions best be allocated? What is the best way to allocate the catch that must be reduced? How to deal with overcapapcity in the fleet at the same time? Can these questions be modeled? What is the policy relevance? Can we assist devloping nations if we can't get our own right? What about co-management? Is it in practice, is it helpful?

And those are just the major events. There so much more I can't get it organized to event talk about. I guess this makes this like one of those Christmas letters you get from various families. It's nice to know the major events, but what does it all mean?

Honestly, I have no clue and don't have the time to worry about it. However, I always have the time to blog about anything marine policy... So comments or suggestions are invited or rather, welcomed. I really have to sleep now... fair tidings to all...

In Appreciation...

Well this is what could be my final post from California - the house is in disarray, boxes everywhere, various half-finished "To Do" lists about the house, packing materials and tape guns scattered around, however, in the absence of the children and husband (they went out to buy lunch and get a haircut for Thomas), I am taking some brief time to blog a bit.

I'd like to express my thanks for the many things and people who have made our stay here a wonderful and fulfilling experience. It has been a great 10 years, and the other night, Ron and I were actually able to get over our apprehension over the move enough to reminisce a bit, which of course got me to thinking about all the people and things I will miss about California.

Now, most of you know the "things" I will miss, the beautiful vibrant city, the grassy hills, the extraordinary beaches with their breathtaking views, the peaceful and majestic redwoods, the abundant wildlife, the fresh organic produce (you all know about Berkeley Bowl by now), the food!!! But I pay them appropriate homage on a regular basis, sometimes omitting the importance of the people we have known...

So I'd like to say Thank you to all of our friends out here, who have been like family, Janis Ing, Teri Ferrell, Lisa Rivera, and Ed and Donna Manguiat and their kids Jeannine and Peter, all of Ron's extremely supportive Schwab colleagues (Judith, Fe, Carmen), Anna and Isabelle (Thomas first "girlfriend"), Richard, my friends and Thomas' from playgroup, Linda and Alex, Jeanette and Nathan and Dylan and Aidan, Matt and Jonathan and Daniel, Gigi and Gianna, and Alexis and McKenna. And to those friends who were a big part of our lives but we don't see much of or have already moved on, Peg, Paul, Mike and Misty, Paul and April, Dennis and Fran, and of course Val - and especially Lisa Barbot and Erica Bornstein and Elijah Aneesh - whom I rarely see anymore but still miss whole bunches!!! And to Jennifer and Alicia (and George and Derek and Kyla), who regularly made the trip up here while she was still in LA, and who paved the path by being the first brave one to leave Massachusetts - and whom I can't wait to see again.

Thank you to our family, who visited us as much as was possible considering their busy schedules, and kept in touch with phonecalls and lots of support over the years. Of course thanks to our parents, and our sisters. Especially Auntie Cheryl who has been the closest family we have had over the past 10 years, visiting regularly, always bearing gifts, and her own special brand of humor. And while we have had our moments, Cheryl and I, I still appreciate the support she has shown us, and perhaps have never told her how wonderful a sister she is to Ron, and what a great Auntie she is to Thomas and Ethan and how much I appreciate her always being here for us.

But most of all, I need to thank Ron - for so many things...

For getting up that night back in October 1995 and leaving everything he knew to come with me on my madcap adventure to California...

For supporting me endlessly throughout our time here, like allowing me to work for minimum wage at Marine World Africa because I hated being an admin so much...

For putting me through school at San Jose State, and sitting with me while I interviewed all those people for my Master's thesis, for going through the phone books with me, picking out random people using a random number table, for waiting 5 years for me to finish writing it...

For loving me through everything we have been through...

For giving me two beautiful children, and loving them and caring for them...

For some really great *%x!!! (I guess this one should come before the children one)...

For challenging me every step of the way...

For just being him...

And most of all, for making yet another move, at a time where he is even more comfortable than he was when we left Massachusetts. We have some more great times in front of us, and while there will be some tough times too, I know that we can make it through anything... 143...

Oops - timer going off - back to packing - in the words of the immortal Tigger - TTFN!

Pusillanimous Post

So now I have been accused of making "unfair" comments about my in-laws.

Of course the pusillanimous poster signed the comment "anonymous" - but of course I know it can only be one of my in-laws - as my family member are most definately not online at this time - they are both busy (in my Mom's case preparing for her lobster cookout, or in my sister's case taking care of her two kids) - and I can't either of them imagine spending time during the middle of a beautiful Saturday, reading my blog and making such a pithy comment. Plus, they both know of the concerns I have on both subjects as we have talked at length about them. And of course it has to be someone who I know and who knows us intimately, otherwise they wouldn't assume the comments were unfair.

So my assumption is that the culprit is winging her way here as we speak! I could be wrong (Yes I have been known to be wrong a time or two) - it could actually be Ron, he was online at the time the comment was sent - but of course Ron has other tastes in surfing - and I doubt he'd be bothered enough by the minor mention to bother making a comment, if he even cared enough to read the blog. Now, if I am wrong - well then my effusive apologies...

So - what exactly did I say that was unfair? Well - nothing - I merely told the truth - now perhaps it was an ugly truth - and perhaps it was a mean-spirited truth - but the truth it was nonetheless. I am afraid I am nothing if not candid, and isn't that the purpose of a blog? While Thomas was growing up, he was often referred to as a "Mama's boy" - I repeatedly explained to those who used the term that I found the term offensive, and that it was unfair, trying to explain that his clinginess was a natural part of his development. But, my explanations were for naught, and inevitably when he was a young toddler, everytime he went running to me for comfort, that unpleasant comment was uttered, and I had to grit my teeth and listen to it. And of course those of you who know Thomas now, know that he certainly doesn't warrant that awful label!

The only other comment I can construe as being unfair is the "chagrin" of my in-laws in regards to our upcoming move, and perhaps the lucrative comment - now I can't imagine that is unfair, as they have openly expressed their feelings that we should not be doing this (moving that is), and have rarely had a positive thing to say about it. And there are no bones about the fact that it all is about the money, it's what they are concerned about. What will Ron do for work...Where will he work...How will you pay the health insurance...How will you live...What about money...

There have been no comments like - Wow - you are going back to school that's great! You are going to fulfill your lifelong dream and become a doctor!

OR - Wow - you guys will be able to afford a house - and to get out of that rotten apartment life you have lived for SOOOO long!

OR Great - the kids will finally be able to have a yard, and will not have to listen to police sirens, and the people upstairs banging around all night!

OR - Well at least Ron will finally be able to advance his career! - because even those of our friends here who have worked at Schwab admit that he has hit his glass ceiling and will go nowhere within the infrastructure of Schwab, and that (contrary to popular beliefs) Schwab is not the be-all end-all job! They all also think it's a great thing for us to do!

OR - That's great - Thomas and Ethan will be able to visit their Lola and Papa!! Even my mother, who also expresses her fears about our fiscal stability, says - "But aren't they excited that their grandkids will be closer to them" - which as many of you know is one of the major reasons we are moving back East - to be close - or at least closer to our families and so that Thomas and Ethan can get to know their Aunties and Uncles and Grandparents... But for some reason - and perhaps it IS unfair of me to point to cultural biases, they can't get past the money issue.

So I say to you "Anonymous Poster" the only thing that is unfair is that I am brave enough to post my thoughts in the open where everyone can see them, and sign my name to them proudly. And that you censure me behind the behind the guise of an anonymous post.

The Job...

For those of you who have had the SAHM job, you might know what I am talking about. To be so defined by your position, replacing your identity, almost losing your self, is really unimaginable in any other form of "work". You are immediately identified by both strangers and friends as a "Mom", many, in fact, stop referring to you by your given name - replacing it with the ubiquitous "Mom". There is no hiding the signs of SAH Motherhood; loose comfortable (say sloppy) food-stained clothing, children always nearby or in many cases attached at the hip, tissues and cheerios in your jeans and coat pockets, the briefcase or laptop replaced with the "black hole" pocketbook with various small toys and books sunk at the bottom, the "trying always to be cheery and patient" persona, the sometimes glazed look after many sleepless nights of gas and teething pains and various other childhood ailments, the exceptional ability to create a (somewhat) balanced lunch for babies and toddlers, when there is nothing in the fridge, these are some of the signs of a SAHM.

Many mothers of earlier generations don't understand the unrest and frustration that many SAH Moms feel today. Most were brought up believing that their worth would be judged by how well they raised their families, that was the standard by which women were judged. Two-income families were rarer back then, generally a phenomenon of the lower class. The suburban explosion created a perfect niche for families with kids, large neighborhoods with many children of similar ages where Moms could congregate with other "like-Moms" of similar socio-economic status and interests, while Dads commuted to work mostly on a standard 9-5. They held their coffee-clatches, played Mah-Jong, or Bridge for social enrichment, sold Tupperware or drove a bus as their kids got older for a little extra cash, performed civic duties for advancement in the eyes of the community. Living the life they had dreamed of, or at the very least were expected to live.

Then came the feminist revolution, and a whole new generation of girls were raised to believe that not only could they be mothers and caregivers, but doctors, lawyers, astronauts - the sky was the limit. Girls were encouraged to go to college, start careers, be successful in business and at home. Eventually we hit our 30's and realized we needed to put our dreams of careers on hold and start our families if we were going to have them. The first baby arrived and the excitement was wonderful, some of us were able to leave our careers behind, replacing the email, day planners and meetings with round the clock breastfeeding and baby books. We were lucky to be able to stay at home and take care of our kids, raising them according to a whole new set of rules - attachment parenting. The baby books encouraged us to put aside the household chores, spending as much time with our growing infants as possible. Don't put your babies in playpens while you do the housework, the housework can wait, your baby will thrive best on your doting affection. Let the laundry pile up, your kids are more important. Get your "attachment-parenting" husband to help with the household chores - the feminist revolution freed them from traditional roles too! Don't use walkers, not only are they dangerous, but floor playtime with your child is better for them, they need to be able to explore their surroundings. Parenting is a round-the-clock affair, sleeping with your kids is good for them. Feeding time is a time for exploration and learning, self-feeding is to be encouraged, it is not the time for a child to sit with his hands held by his mother while she busily shovels food into his mouth with a spoon to keep down the mess. If they must watch television it is best if you watch along with them. And while we firmly believe all these ideas are correct, outside influences and societal values eventually start to creep in...

Older generations frown on many of the new ideas, co-sleeping (while actually an old idea practiced throughout the world for thousands of years) is simply not accepted in American culture. I am pretty sure that my mother thinks that my allowing my children to self-feed is disgusting. And of course getting the husband to help with the household chores is easier in theory than in practice. But these are problems and criticisms I can deal with. The real problem arises when after the new glow of parenthood has worn off, and you find that motherhood really consists of trying to balance "quality" time with your kids with picking up mess after mess after mess, emptying the dishwasher at least daily, trudging through the piles of laundry, and organizing playgroups with Moms whose most interesting topic of conversation is what type of "kiddy sunblock" is best, or where to get the cheapest canned fruit . My conversations used to be about big ideas, politics and world events, now each day has become a monotonous blend of feeding, cleaning up from feeding, changing diapers, feeding again, napping, feeding again, cleaning up from feeding all while trying to fit enough housework to stop your husband from giving you those oh-so-subtle digs about how trashed the house looks, and how unsatisfying the meals are when he gets home at night (or in my case after you pick him up from work).

Now don't get me wrong, I LOVE my kids and am thrilled to have been able to spend the last three years with them. They are bright, loving, articulate and well adjusted children - and everyone I meet loves them (almost as much as we do). I have enjoyed being able to breastfeed them "on demand" for pretty much as long as they have required it. More importantly they DESERVE the attention that I have lavished on them over the past three years. Thomas, especially, is proof that while it may not work any better than Dr. Spock's ideas, attachment parenting DOES work in creating a secure, independent, outgoing, happy, friendly child. He has not become the "Mama's Boy" that many of my in-laws accused him of being as a baby, not understanding that all babies are securely attached to their mothers as an instinctual defense mechanism, or perhaps understanding it but disappointed or maybe even jealous that his trust lied with me and not them, a problem I am sure I will have with Ethan as well now that he is going through his period of separation anxiety. Now, whether it can work to eliminate some of the problems that have plagued me over my life, problems that many attachment parenting experts suggest could be related to child rearing techniques of the last generation, procrastination and fear of failure (which contributes mightily to the previous), still remains to be seen. It will be an interesting ride.

But, back to the subject - with the complete support (at least on the surface) AND much to the chagrin of my in-laws (with the notable exception of Elaine) we are moving back to the East Coast, to Delaware, where I intend to abandon my children, force my husband to leave his lucrative but going-nowhere job (and we know that in the Filipino culture - lucrative is all that matters) to indulge my selfish desire to become a Doctor - now of course off the subject again a bit, but if I were going to Med School and not getting my PhD in the esoteric field of Marine Policy would I then have the support of my in-laws or is it just an age thing?? While it may seem like a completely selfish move on my part, and I will admit I NEED this to happen - it is really best for the whole family. It comes back to the old question of what is a woman's role in life, society and the home - can I be satisfied, will I be satisfied, should I be satisfied by staying at home and raising my children - No, No and No...

"She could give up her ____ and stay home with ___. Was it so terrible, staying home to raise a child like a conventional mother?...With so much in her life she didn't need the added burden of ___ did she? Could she stay home and be a wife and mother? How long would she be content with that? Forever. But even as her heart spoke the word, her mind recognized the lie. There was room in her for other passions." (from the Firebrand by Susan Wiggs)

Room for other passions - that pretty much sums it up for me - while my children are perhaps my greatest passion - there is room for much more - and it certainly won't be satisfied by me blogging away my frustrations, attending playgroups or running the local civic organization. Having been raised and encouraged to pursue my dreams (at the age of 7 I wanted to be the President, and I was never told I couldn't be), I cannot suddenly put aside all my dreams to conform to some idealized vision of what a mother should be. I am hoping (and frankly expecting) that the fulfillment that I will get from achieving my dreams will be as much of a positive influence on my children's lives, in terms of their psychological well-being as well as their fiscal solvency, as it will be on mine.

Good Night... (Photo from UDel, CMS, Offshore Wind Power webpage (http://www.ocean.udel.edu/windpower/))
Posted by Hello

All is NOT Quiet on the Western Front

Wow - what a roller coaster of a day - with the move coming closer emotions are running high in our house. It started out normally, us driving Ron in to work around 10 - he's been sick for 2 days but had to go to work today - Thomas was excited to go to playgroup afterwards. When we dropped Ron off - I called to find out where playgroup was going to be (because of the rain) and found out it was canceled - first bummer of the day - how do you explain to a three year-old that playgroup has been canceled - he kept saying That's OK we'll just go to the Mall (play area) and Jonathan (his friend from playgroup) will be there. Now of course the mall play area is NOT where playgroup is and Jonathan would NOT be there - and because Thomas has a bit of a sniffle (maybe allergies - I am not sure) I didn't want to expose him to the Mall - but of course once his mind was set on the Mall it's hard to change it. Plus I just didn't want to be in the Mall - I admit I was pretty peeved - but how can you be peeved at the mud at the park (where playgroup usually is) so Finally I (sort of) convinced him that it would be more fun to go see the baby seals at the Marine Mammal Center.

He's been potty training - not very successfully - Ron of course puts in back in diapers whenever he can - which doesn't help much - but that's another story - the nanny (well ex-nanny at this point) doesn't help much either - another story - but we stopped to get a coffee and have him go to the potty at Peet's in the Marina and made it into the potty room where he promptly went in his pants while standing next to the toilet - or he missed the toilet while he was sitting on it and went in his pants - I am not sure - and neither was he - but no matter - we got our coffee and went out to the car to change him, it started to rain...

I was still determined not to be stuck at the Mall - or at home for that matter where he (as expected of a three-year-old) would just keep making mess after mess -that I would spend my day cleaning up - you know toys here, toys there, paint, paper whatever... So I decided - shit - I used to work outside in the winter in much worse weather than CA could ever throw at us - we have an umbrella - so the Marine Mammal Center it was.

What a beautiful ride - up through the Marin Headlands - we chose to go over the mountain rather than around it and got to the top and were totally socked in with fog - now if you haven't been up over the top of the hill at the Marin headlands you have to go - it's scary enough in the sunshine - but today it was eerily and spookily beautiful. The clouds were holding tight to the top of the mountain - and as we went over the top of the hill down onto that steep drop - visibility was less than 20 feet in front of us - I thought maybe I was a little crazy, but was feeling a bit reckless - so I kicked in the 4WD as a precaution - and went really slow down the winding curves, each with a drop steep enough to give anyone vertigo - with the fog you couldn't see the drop off, but knowing it was still there, AND that you couldn't see it made it all the more exhilarating. Thomas was a little scared - but a good scared - he likes going up and down the hills in the car - we do it a lot in the city while waiting for Daddy - and kept telling me to go slow and it would be OK - "slower Mommy, slower" ahh the wisdom of three... We finally got to the bottom and over to the Marine Mammal Center - we parked right next to a female red-tail - she was sitting on a telephone wire looking for breakfast - I showed Thomas - he decided she was looking for a mouse - and we told the next two groups of people about her - with Thomas pointing out that she was looking for a mouse to eat. Thomas also tried (unsuccessfully) to make friends with the 2-ish-year-old that parked behind us on the hill. There were 60 residents - mostly elephant seal pups there, we stayed with a school group for a while, but Thomas got bored pretty quickly because they were mostly sleeping. He was very good at being quiet as all the signs said - much better than the group of school kids.

Luckily, by the time we left the MMC the sun had broken through, as I had hoped it would and it was warming up to be a beautiful day. I think Fort Cronkite and Rodeo beach has to be one of my favorite places to go here in the Bay area (and that's saying a lot - considering how many places I love out here) and today was no exception. The surfers were out in full force, the ocean was really blue - all kinds of blue, the deep ocean was a dark, sapphire blue, the underside of the waves was that beautiful light-filled aqua blue and the waves were choice! - with foamy whitecaps and perfect curls. Geez - I'd love to learn to surf - maybe in my next life... The secluded feeling of a beach bordered by majestic rock monoliths on the South - with the holes underneath, big enough to drive a truck through, so typical of Northern California beaches, bored by the pounding rocks and endless surf - and the high hills of Wolf Ridge to the North, just a half an hour from both my house and one of the most fascinating cities in the world, is somthing that the East Coast doesn't really offer. We crossed the bridge over the lagoon and since it was lunchtime sat down in the sand to eat what we had packed for playgroup - now of course we weren't really prepared for the beach - so eating lunch in the sand wasn't exactly enjoyable - I started to lose my temper as little bits of grit filled all the food and Thomas kept going down to the water at the edge of the lagoon - I had told him he couldn't get his feet wet, and if he did we'd have to go home - Yes - bad move on my part - because of course he did get his feet wet and I didn't back up my threat (somthing I often chide Ron about) because it was too nice a day to leave the beach, and all that was waiting at home was laundry, laundry and more laundry...

So I changed tack and took off his shoes and chilled for a bit and then folded up the blanket, took off my own shoes, and took off Ethan's socks and we left our picnic stuff near the lagoon and walked over to the main beach - closer to the surf. We played for a couple of hours in the sand burying each others feet, making sand castles, which of course Ethan would immediatly crawl on top of and crush down to nothing - if you have never been to Cronkite beach - it's not really sand, it is tiny little round rocks, lots of jade and other beautiful rich colored semi-precious stones that make the sand look more like earth - much bigger than sand grains but small enough to make walking very comfortable - Thomas found (well not found - it has been there as long as I remember) a big old creosote post - the biggest piece of driftwood ever - maybe 30 feet long - 2 feet high, and 2 feet wide - with squared sides - must have been quite a storm surge to get it so high on the beach - and he ran from end to end to end to end, jumping off at the end and then climbing back up and doing it again... I knew then he'd be exhausted by the end of the day. The "lady with the dark glasses" as Thomas named her - Asian wearing sunglasses - came out probably from the MMC offices for her lunch - and read a bit by the big post and took a short nap in the sun - Thomas was fascinated with her and lay down on the back side of the post - right behind her and pretended to nap too! Ethan's mission was to make it over the 50 or so yards of sand to the dog who was frolicking (yes frolicking) in the sand, near the dome tent that her owner had set up - with a big piece of driftwood. The dog looked almost exactly like Laddie - same size, coloring (missing only the white ruff) and demeanor, and I had a little pang of nostalgia... But the dog was soaking wet and playing with a big stick so I kept turning him around or bringing him back when he would get halfway there - he took it with admirable aplomb, for a one-year-old of course.

As I sat there, I knew that this was one of the things I'd miss the most once we leave - the ease of making it to a beautiful beach with my kids, on a whim, no parking hassles, no long trips, no sticky hot sand to trudge through... Don't get me wrong - there are beautiful beaches on the East Coast - but my kind of beach - this kind of beach - only exists here.

So it's funny, I started to write this blog, late, after Ethan crying for what seems like an eternity (he is having some fierce teething issues), me being severely dehydrated (we didn't have enough water with us today - we were only supposed to go to playgroup - so I gave most of it to the kids and of course the teething means lots of "boppy" which dehydrates me) and having a pounding headache exacerbated by Ethan's non-stop wailing, Daddy being very cranky - because he's been sick and Ethan is crying and I am so sick of Ethan crying that I am cranky too, yelling at Ron - him yelling at me - telling me that this is a "disaster of my own making", and that I deserve my headache because I went to the beach today, Thomas crying (because Ethan woke him up) and he is upset because we all are - but of course Thomas is the sweetest boy - as we are laying in bed (Thomas, Ethan (wailing) and I (trying to ignore Ethan's wailing and holding my head to stop the pounding), Thomas gingerly lifts up my t-shirt and points to the "boppy" and then to Ethan and whispers "I think it would help Mommy" - ANYWAY - I started to write this blog to vent out my frustrations - but as I reflect on the day, I can only remember how lucky I am to live in this beautiful place with my beautiful family. The GenPril I took have kicked in - we dosed up Ethan with Baby Orajel and Tylenol and he's out like a light, and All IS Quiet on the Western Front.

A cheap plug for a great artist

If you are in the mood for some thought provoking art - check out Rich's website (click on his name, then click on "my webpage" and select the paintings tab -

Rich - I really like the new (2004) paintings you posted - when's your next show? And when are we going to do coffee?

look at those teeth!
Posted by Hello

Hello - Welcome to our Blog!
Posted by Hello

First Entry

Always wanted a blog - so I could babble on, and perhaps fill the world with my wisdom?

So I started one - really because I wanted to post on the LOCE Wind and Wave Energy blogspot and had to sign up to do so - so here it is...

Wow! A Blog! I am so excited...
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What is a blog?

If you don't know, a blog is short for "weblog" - basically it is an online diary. For now I set this one up to get some experience with blogging and to get my friends and family familiar with the process. Eventually I'd like to create an "Environmental" blog - a source for discussion and debate regarding the issues that matter to me (Yes it's all about me - if you want it to be about you - get your own blog - kidding, I am kidding ;-)) - similar to the blog I was reading (http://renewablesoffshore.blogspot.com ) which started the whole process.

Please feel free to post or comment as often as you like, I set my blog up as a team blog and if you got an invitation, you are welcome to post. I'd love to hear your comments, and what you are thinking about - if you download the correct software (let me know if you need info) you can post pictures, or blog from an email (write an email and post it to the blog).

Over the next weeks you may read about the trials and tribulations of moving, potty training, Ethan's first steps - no he hasn't taken them yet - the "nanny", playgroup, maybe I'll even start diatribing about how Arnold is plotting to ruin California, good thing we are getting out! - who knows???

For now just enjoy the pics and send me a post - talk to you soon